Tuesday, November 09, 2004

You Shall Not Pass

I took a test on the internet "Which Sci-Fi Character are You?" [http://www.tk421.net/character/ A wandering spirit caring for a multitude of just concerns, you are an instrumental power in many of the causes around you. And so am I, very dangerous: more dangerous than anything you will ever meet, unless you are brought alive before the seat of the Dark Lord. Gandalf is a character from the Middle-Earth universe. TheOneRing.net has a description of him.] Thank the science fiction deities I was not Wesley Crusher. That would call for a stiff dose of some prescription drug. To my secret (?) pleasure I was Gandalf. Okay, not secret. I bragged about it to every sci-fier I could think of. Nyah, nyah, nyah, nhay, nyah, nyah, I'm Gandalf and you're not! I digress; last night I watched part of The Fellowship of the Ring--the scene in the Mines of Moria. Wow. That's about all I can say, wow. Gandalf discusses pity and predestination with Frodo. Pity stayed Bilbo's hand and kept him from killing Gollum. Bilbo was meant to find the ring, hence Frodo was meant to have it. That is a happy thought. Happy that Frodo now faces certain destruction in his journey to destroy the ring? Is he nuts? Then Gandalf freely gives his life in his stand against the Balrog, summoning his power to forbid the passage of the demon of the dark. I cheer, I weep. I want to be like Gandalf. For the White Wizard is right. Understanding that there is a plan keeps us going through the darkness and the battles. Were there no plan, there would be no point to the suffering. Were there no stand to defend our fellowship and our mission, there would be no one left to cast the one ring into the fires of Mount Doom. I have a friend who always debates with me that God's sovereignty takes a back seat to man's free will, hence the evil in the world. I find this world view depressing. I don't see joy in this loved one's life. If God is not sovereign, pass the prescription drugs please, because I don't want to be coherent. Although I know my heart is more like Gollum, I yearn to be like Gandalf. He sees the big picture and believes the guys in white hats will win. Not because they are strong and powerful. Hardly. They'll win because they know that they are weak. They'll succeed only by working together and having faith that they fight for something greater than themselves. They welcome allies and battle through the night until dawn breaks on the fourth day because what they hold onto is worth fighting for. Bilbo's pity of Gollum saved the day in the end, for Gollum forced Frodo's hand (literally) and sent the ring spiralling into the destructive fires. God uses the foolishness of men to confound and bring about good. But that's not enough for me. I don't want God to use me in spite of myself. I don't want to be cast into the fire. I want to be at the triumphant wedding celebration at the end (preferably standing beside Legolas), rejoicing with my comrades that we have fought the good fight, that we have won the victory, and that we have earned crowns to give back to the one true king--the true Aragorn. For that matter, the true Gandalf, the true Sam, the true Frodo--for are they not all different facets of the one whose fellowship we seek? Change me from a Gollum to a Gandalf, that I may rejoice in time to come. Let me start by encouraging the faint of heart and defending the fellowship by standing firm, with my life if need be, knowing I shall be resurrected as a White Wizard to serve the one who raised me up.

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